Dear Gretchen Rubin, Your Happiness Project book instructed me to make my bed every day to start my day off right. Making my bed and my kids’ beds is not making me feel satisfied, it is leaving me less time to do what makes me happy: watching Reality TV, writing, shopping, poking around doing crafty projects. Then when I read your follow up to The Happiness Project, you kind of freak me out that you don’t have any stuff or collections.
Dear June Cleaver, cleaning the house after my kids leave for school and cooking so many dinners from scratch is not leaving me fulfilled. I feel more like Betty Draper.
Dear Jessica Alba, I am not buying your Honest Company products. There’s something about a gorgeous movie star with cute children and lots of cash, with a husband named Cash that doesn’t make me want to support your business. I’ll sick to my giant jug of white vinegar, my Johnson’s baby shampoo & maybe some cleaning supplies from Whole Foods if I am feeling anxious about chemicals in my bloodstream that day.
Dear Gwyneth, I am not reading your GOOP blog anymore. Getting your cookbook as a Christmas gift from my husband is enough support for your extracurricular endeavors.
Wishing there was more time to do things for me,
June Carol Clair
I have to admit, I still read the weekly GOOP. It’s usually the funniest thing I read all week. I’ll never need a $500 sweater with hearts all over it, but I do need to know that Gwyneth wants me to get one.
–kara