Around the time Good Morning America got back on the “moms drinking during playdates” story that the New York Times ran like, two years ago, I started to rethink my position as a mom. No, it wasn’t because my mom casually/alarmingly mentioned the Playdate Happy Hour segment (need I remind her of the 70s and bringing her toddler to an outdoor concert where people were doing more than sipping Pinot Grigio?). It was because I started to feel a little guilty. I always feel guilty, but I was feeling more guilty than usual.
More guilty than the days after a fun night out when you think: I am never drinking again. I am almost 40. I have no business dancing on a party bus when I am a mom and have to take care of 3 kids Sunday morning. God, I am going to need a bacon, egg and cheese on a bagel.
It’s more about feeling guilty about not acting more like a mom. I love having my wine and cheese on a Friday afternoon and let the kids play in the basement or in the front yard while I gossip with the ladies. But sometimes the grown up conversations and the pleasant buzz gets in the way of the child rearing. Now my oldest is in third grade. She knows what’s going on. It’s time to be a little more appropriate, (one of my favorite words to use as a mom).
Most of my thirty and forty-something friends are lucky enough to live in a neighborhood or school district with some like-minded friends. Friends that like to have a few beers and get a little R-O-W-D-Y while the kids run through the sprinklers. It’s one thing to tie one on at the Block Party, the Progressive Dinner, Hell- the Super Bowl- but it’s another to treat every gathering like an adult party, when we are more often than not getting together because of the kids. (And yes, I am talking about dads here, too).
So, to put it in TV perspective: take a cue from Regan on Up All Night, who is slowly figuring out that she can still have some fun as a mom but is not as cool as she used to be and that’s okay. Her new baby Amy is worth toning it down.
Although, maybe she is still figuring that out. Maybe we all are.